Saturday, July 7, 2007

Dysfunctional Couple Magazine Says Dike Lesbian Couples Make The Best Neighbors











Dysfunctional Couple Magazine Editor, Doozie Beagles, conducted a survey of 500 normal couples who lived next door to dysfunctional couples.

Her findings support previous studies conducted by Krokodil Consulting Group that show that normal couples prefer Dike Lesbians as neighbors hands down.

Ms. Doozie Beagles explained that the appeal of Dike Lesbians mainly is the result of them maintaining the curb appeal of their abode. Also Dike Lesbians normally confine their sex to their backyard pool. The moaning from the Dike Lesbians sex seems to be a welcome break from a pool full of screaming kids.

The complete list of Dysfunction Couples that normal people would like to have as neighbors is as follows;

1. Dike Lesbians 68%
2. Hot Lesbians 20%
3. Transgender (male to female) 5%
4. Gay Males 4%
5. Interracial Couple (Black Male and Big Boned trashy white female) 2%
6. Interracial gay Couple ( Gay Black Male and Gay White Male) .5%
7. All Other dysfunctional couples .5%

Ms. Beagles says the percentages have an error factor of + or - 1%.

Justice fo’all.

12 comments:

Jenn said...

I audibly yelled at the picture of Rosie. S/He does not have nice hair.

Anonymous said...

Is that the illegitimate love child of Rosie and a Sasquatch?

Anonymous said...

It's pretty obvious I need to slap the crap out of you.

The Lazy Iguana said...

I prefer hot lesbians to live next door. I can not deal with all that back hair.

Anonymous said...

you haven't commented on my last two posts. this makes me sad and the way I deal with that is to stab people. so I guess I will stab you

Herr Krokodil said...

Emma,

I hear you woman. I'm not fond of big-boned lesbians.

Big Foot,

I don't know who the blonde is but she does look like she's related to Sasquatch.

Doozie,

You're exciting me when you talk rough like that. Is your last name really Beagles? I like it kinda rough but not too rough.

The Lazy,

Hot lesbians are great on video but they make lousy neighbors. They like to drive those loud Dodge Ram Pick-ups.

Doozie,

I've been trained to kill people in hand to hand combat. I could pull your lung out in 3 seconds with my bare hands. Since you live so far away though I won't do this.

I took a nap this afternoon then went to church. I totally skipped dinner.

By the way I don't think you're a dysfunctional couple because you're just one person.

The Lazy Iguana said...

I do not care what they drive. Really. As long as they leave a window open.

Herr Krokodil said...

The Lazy,

You make a good point.

I can't believe the number of lesbians I see these days. Women eating together at lunch, women walking through the mall together, it's great.

Anonymous said...

This one time I punched a guy out for having too much hair on his back. When I see a woman with a freaking beard, I want to eliminate her. There was an employee the other day that had a goatee. I ripped her chin off

Herr Krokodil said...

QZ,

Hair should be on the top of the head only. I use to know a woman with a beard but the last time I saw her she had shaved. I knew her for 15 years with a beard. I kinda liked her better with the beard.

Anonymous said...

please don't diss on your sister like that

Anonymous said...

Doozie,

My sister could kick my ass and your flabby ass.