Friday, March 20, 2009

double hernia operation

i'm no lomger interested in having sex, internet porn is enough for me.

i also had that nasty nubin on my stomach stuck back in.

The pain is really bad though.

in a bit of good news i was able to make a small fart this morning.

Six days since the operation and i was able to go number 2 today, thank you milk of magnesia.

update, i know i said i wasn't going to have sex anymore but that was before Valerie Bertonelli lost 50 lbs. i really want to get back in sex condition for Valerie.


Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Woman Arrested for kissing Penis of a Replica of Michael Angelo’s David by American Artist Herr Krokodil

AKRON, Ohio — A woman has been arrested on suspicion of kissing the penis of a replica of Michael Angelo’s David by American artist Herr Krokodil and smudging the statue’s bone-white penis with her lipstick, Ohio judicial officials said Saturday.

Police said they arrested a woman whose, identity has not been released, after she kissed the statue’s penis on Thursday. The woman keeps insisting that the statue is a colleague and is 19-years-old. If found competent the woman will be tried in a court in the southern city of Youngstown on Aug. 16 for "damage to a work of art," judicial officials said.

The statue, which is worth an estimated $20 million, was on display at the Museum of Contemporary Art in Akron. It is part of an exhibition slated to run at the museum through Sept. 30th, 2010.

Krokodil is known for his abstract sculpting techniques, repetitive themes and the use of his own body as the model for his statues.

Police say the woman was wearing a distinctive orange shade of lipstick so the arrest was rather easy.

Krokodil has lived in Davie for over half- century. He won the prestigious Golden Gator award at the Micanopy Statue Biennale in 2001.

Justice fo’ all.

Saturday, July 21, 2007

Picture Stolen From Doozie


I altered the picture because I did not find it exciting.

Justice fo' all.

Nuclear Power vs. Renewable Energy

It would take one windmill to power Dirty’s vibrator while one nuclear rod could power all the vibrators in Ohio. This video gives a rare glimpse of the Wind and its power. I really think the Wind is trying to mislead you.

If a nuclear plant has a meltdown a horn will sound and you can get in your car and hall butt the other way.

Justice fo’ all.

Friday, July 20, 2007

Three Hour Tour

At my thirty-year class reunion, the fellas carried me around the Sheraton Sand Key shouting Herr Kokodil is omnipotent, not impotent. Why you ask. Because back in high school I put the names of the girls who would look great in thirty years in one tube and put the girls who would be obese slobs in another. The rule of the game was the girl had to be attractive back in high school. Well I’ve always been able to pick the hottest and most wild chicks, so I won.

But, to this day I cannot decide whether I would have shacked up with Ginger or Maryanne on Gilligan’s Island. This really bugs me. You say do both, but I always choose the best and what if the one I had sex with first wasn’t the best? Then I would have been wrong.

Justice fo’ all.